Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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