dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Randomize
