Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
