you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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