new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
accomplished twins. life is a go
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Randomize
