we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
