Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
