But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
