I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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