Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Randomize
