He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
