Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
