your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
