somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
