Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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