Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
