...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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