So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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