I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You smell like stripper and shame
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
