just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize