Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
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