is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
