Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
