Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
