Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
