Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
