I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
