I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
you will always have a special place in my vag
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
