idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
