My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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