dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
