Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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