Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
