You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
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