It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
