I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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