why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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