This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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