I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
