She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize