: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
