spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
