physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
