I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
This is the high leading the old right now
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
