69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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