I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
