I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
