Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
