she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
