The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
you win again, gameday.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
